I bet you are!
Wait a minute! Hard to what? It’s more than clear that no man on Earth can kill the tough Steven and his iconic ponytail.
Everyone who has watched his big debut “Above the law” should know that by now.
Being the second film in his career, “Hard to Kill” marks the rise of Seagal’s star in Hollywood.
Directed by Bruce Malmuth (“Pentathlon” with Dolph Lundgren), the movie first aired in February 1990 and immediately became a box-office champion grossing nearly $48 million in the USA.
As a matter of fact, that year was very beneficial in terms of glorious action movie productions.
Big titles such as “Total Recall” with Arnold Schwarzenegger, “Die Hard 2” with Bruce Willis, “Air America” with Mel Gibson and “Another 48 hours” with Nick Nolte were all a product of the year 1990.
Without a further ado, let’s head to the plot of the action hit, subject to this review.
Lovably clichéd as well as absurdly funny at some point, “Hard to Kill” revolves around the tough cop Mason Storm who investigates high-level corruption in the underground crime world of Los Angelis.
His life is abruptly ruined after one evening the mafia infiltrates his house and guns down his wife and kid.
Mason survives the attack but due to his severe injuries enters into a coma for 7 years.
After he comes out of the coma (and he is awake because Death is afraid of Steven Seagal), he is thirsty for revenge, especially when he discovers that his son is still alive.
When Mason finds out that the life of his son is jeopardized by the same pathetic human beings who slaughtered his beloved wife 7 years ago, he decides to take justice into his own hands.
Murdered family, revenge, a cop – take these three ingredients and you can easily cook a nice, funny and clichéd American action pie.
The examples are as many as the stars in the sky but let’s focus on the particular one.
By the time of filming, Steven Seagal was married to the sexy model and actress Kelly Le Brock who was semi-retired from acting.
She decided to take part in the movie as a favor to her husband who was rising to stardom by that time.
Kelly Le Brock plays the kind nurse Andy who helps Mason in his dangerous ventures.
Branscombe Richmond (“Renegade”), Dean Norris (“Breaking Bad”) and the scary-looking tattooed Mexican Danny Trejo (“Machete”) are among the most famous names in the rest of the cast.
This is a Funny Action Movie Because:
Here comes the difficult part.
From where to start?
First off, let’s begin by giving the due credit to the main lead.
Steven Seagal is a renowned martial artist and an interesting person but his acting is as good as the acting of the porn stars. Lisa Ann and Rocco Siffredi, for instance, are the first names that come to my mind.
In most of the scenes, his face is either emotionless, either too intense, especially when he is giving raw justice by breaking thousands of hands thanks to his fast Aikido techniques.
The screenplay and the writing are poor and naïf but that is not a surprise given the fact that all the attention goes to the fighting scenes.
Sure enough, all that makes the actioner hilariously entertaining.
Now let’s give a proper credit to the ones that invented the story.
The genius writers decided to put Mason out of comma after 7 years without any visible trace of physical or brain damage (except the long ridiculous beard and hair).
Could it be possible that Segal’s character inspired the creation of the famous sci-fi movie “Iron Man”?
Storm starts showing some incredible fighting skills and stamina only 5 minutes after awakening from the deep coma.
He starts beating up people while still wearing his hospital pajamas.
Which is more absurd is the fact that seven years have passed but nothing has changed around.
The villains look exactly the same, they are dressed the same way as seven years ago, the city is unchanged at all and everything is intact by the sands of time.
What about the mandatory sex scene?
Well, it is there.
Of course, to maintain his macho image, Steven is banging a hot nurse.
His first kiss with Andy immediately evolves into a passionate sexual intercourse on the floor.
It happens while Mason is practicing his martial arts techniques by hitting the air with a stick and at the same time performs funny dance moves that are helping him to be a better fighter. Nobody knows how and why.
By the way in one of the scenes, Seagal is jogging as part of his rehabilitation and I have to tell you that the way he runs is hilarious.
The man looks like some puppet on a chain with his long hanging hands.
Now back to the sex scene.
Suddenly the beautiful Andy enters the room dressed in a sexy short black dress.
She gives the sweaty Mason a flower by saying ‘I thought that you might like this flower’.
After that, they begin to express their mutual sympathy, so to speak.
What a sensual love story! Titanic and James Cameron, sink down!
Mason’s new intimate friend with medical skills becomes a great sidekick to him.
The sexy nurse helps Mason Storm to neutralize the numerous hostile enemies by frantically screaming “Mason, look out”, or “Oh my God, there!” as well as “I am scared”.
Near the end of the movie, our revengeful cop infiltrates a notorious senator’s mansion.
He kills everyone but the senator, because, ladies and gentlemen, Mason Storm is a noble man of honor.
After its release, ‘Hard to Kill’ received mainly negative reviews and the critics described it as ‘generic’.
However, as I like to say, it is better to watch an enjoyable bad movie than to watch a good boring movie.
Fans of the genre, please hear me out. This movie will definitely rock you!
It is a great, highly entertaining vintage Steven Seagal cop movie.
Moreover, it is a fine example of the action flicks, made in the early 90’s.
With its amusing, old school action scenes, Steven Seagal’s undeniable charm and powerful martial arts sequences, ‘Hard to Kill’ definitely deserves a watch.
Do you want to have fun with this flick? If you trust my judgment, feel free to rent it or buy it on Amazon. The price is ridiculous.
Do you prefer the old Steven Seagal movies or the newer ones?Does he still make good action films or his best days are gone? Leave me a comment below!